“Thor’s Chariot” ( 2 x 06 )

…Well. The title screen shows possibly the weirdest-looking alien I’ve ever seen. Could this be Thor in his “true form” or something? We already know that aliens influenced human history.

…Nah.

Let’s just watch and see…

We start off on Base, and (per usual) a klaxon blares and the iris closes over the Stargate. Nothing gets in, but they do pick up the faint signature from something the crew left on Cimmeria (“Thor’s Hammer”), and speculate that maybe the box was sent back through deliberately. Also, they think that Thor might be part of a race known as the “Asgard”. Why I don’t remember this is beyond me. Whoops. I presume they’re some kind of protector race.

O’Neill is slightly reluctant to go back to check on the Cimmerians, primarily because they had destroyed Thor’s Hammer (the de-Goa’uld-ing device, as Jack called it) in order to save Teal’c. Jackson, on the other hand, thinks that they will understand.

They send a MALP through, and the sight is not pretty. There’s been a brutal battle – and who would the culprits be but our slimy friends, the Goa’uld. Or, more likely, one Goa’uld and about a hundred Jaffa. The probe zooms in on a Jaffa, but he doesn’t have a serpent on his forehead. Rather, it’s a bird of some kind. However, Gairwyn (the woman they met there) is alive, and she begs them to come and help them.

Clearly, SG-1 is going to be paying for their misdeeds. In destroying Thor’s Hammer, they quite possibly left Cimmeria entirely open to attack. And now they’ve got to go back and fix it all up. O’Neill echoes this sentiment, and they convince the General to let them go.

They step out, and it’s a beautiful day… except for the dead bodies. That’s kind of a mood-ruiner. They also see a Goa’uld structure going up in the distance.

Gairwyn then approaches them and tells SG-1 that this whole ordeal began with a “great metal point coming out of the sky”. Teal’c clarifies and says it was a Goa’uld Ha’tak – a pyramid ship.

(You know, I really hate those things. They’re kind of ugly and clunky. More like a Star Wars ship than a Star Trek one. But I don’t think the Goa’uld were exactly going for aesthetics. Anyways…)

A couple of Jaffa advance on them, and they fight back, and are able to get away through the forest. These ground combat firefights are actually pretty cool, it’s just they’re hard to really capture in a blog format like this. They’re neat to watch, though, so that’s why you really have to just watch the series. (Hint, hint.)

Gairwyn takes the crew to the residence of the late Kendra. She was killed in the Goa’uld raid. Carter finds a glove-like device (the same kind that we often see on the Goa’uld – remember, Kendra was once a host, herself) and, surprise-surprise, Carter can activate it. She can make it work, but she can’t necessarily control it. Nonetheless, she takes a couple of the Goa’uld devices with her back to the Cimmerian hiding spot, deep in a cave.

SG-1 and Gairwyn (moreso the former) are met with hostility, primarily from one man, Olaf. He still resents them for bringing this plague on them, as it were. However, their promises may have been enough, and Olaf lowers his weapon. He, O’Neill, and Teal’c sneak past the patrols to get a look at who they’re facing.

O’Neill and Teal’c hide in the tall grasses, Olaf with them, and see a multitude of Jaffa bearing the mark of Horus, as we find out from Teal’c. The Goa’uld they defend is Heru’ur, the son of Ra and Hathor. The bird forehead marking is his, and some of the guards have very bizarre-looking helmets, not unlike the fashion of the Serpent Guard of Apophis. Oh, and Heru’ur is among the most feared and the worst Goa’uld pretty much ever.

The Jaffa capture Olaf, and Heru’ur reveals himself. He’s got an even creepier voice than Apophis… nor is he as attractive. (DANGIT.) He demands that Olaf tell him about SG-1 coming through the ‘Gate, but he refuses, and is tortured by the Goa’uld’s palm device. At that point, Teal’c and O’Neill jump in, shoot down the nearest guards, and grab Olaf. Before they both leave all the way, though, Teal’c turns and destroys the staff weapon with his own. An unusually frightened look – one I don’t recall even seeing around Apophis – crosses his face as Heru’ur’s eyes flash. Was there some kind of bad blood or ancient rivalry between Apophis and Heru’ur? Maybe. For some reason, though, the Goa’uld doesn’t even pursue them. Instead, he just sends his Jaffa after them. (Lazy.)

The three return to the cave and report their findings to Jackson and Carter. However, they have findings of their own. Gairwyn has told them of a fabled “Hall of Thor’s Might”, and the two think that there may be Asgard weapons or something in there. We also get a (unintentionally, by the characters) funny little dialogue piece between Jackson and Teal’c:

“Well, I guess we’ll just have to hole up in here until things calm down.”

“Things will not calm down, Daniel Jackson. They will, in fact, calm up.”

…I love you, Teal’c. ♥

Ahem, anyways, Olaf, O’Neill, and Teal’c go off to lay down some explosives and Gairwyn, Jackson, and Carter go to find this hall of awesome-superness. And aliens. Don’t forget aliens.

What the latter group finds is some kind of obelisk. Jackson touches it, and they find themselves transported into a dark hall. A holographic Thor (not this dude again!) show up and says that they must prove themselves worthy. The floor suddenly falls apart between them and the next obelisk, and a very thin catwalk is in-between.

Uh-oh. I hope they all took gymnastics!

Carter goes first, and makes it across fine. Gairwyn starts next, but when the ground shakes, she falls and panics, insisting she won’t be able to get across. Jackson goes to her to help her up, and then the beam breaks… and the floor’s back!

The Thor hologram reappears and says that it was a test of selflessness and bravery. They now must complete one more task, though, before finding Thor’s Might.

Meanwhile, Teal’c and O’Neill are setting down charges, while Olaf keeps watch. When the Jaffa approach, they set off charges, and then take down the rest, O’Neill using his gun and Teal’c his staff weapon. However, Olaf gets the final hurrah when he takes down a Jaffa with his battle ax. (Sa-weet!)

The next task in the Hall is a riddle. It has to do with some runes, some shapes, numbers, and some random-looking drawings. Somehow, with all these, in a process I didn’t fully understand because I am not as smart as Daniel Jackson, they figure out that the answer is “Pi”. Yes, “Pi”. 3.14. They draw a radius into the circle, and an alien appears. But it’s not like the garden-variety-Stargate alien. It’s like… a really alien alien. It looks like one from off of those cheesy ‘60’s movies; the “Roswell Grays”.

And he’s Thor. This scrawny thing – an Asgard indeed – is Thor.

…Not quite what I was expecting.

The Thor image is also a real-time transmission, and Jackson speaks to him. He confesses that they destroyed his Hammer. Thor seems peeved that these Tau’ri interfered, and sends Jackson and Carter back to the first obelisk… but Gairwyn is nowhere to be found.

They return to the cave, and the odds aren’t good. They’re all outnumbered twenty-to-one and are forced out of hiding. Further, they are forced to put down their weapons, or all the Cimmerians would be killed. The Jaffa capture them and begin to lead them all away.

As they are walking, though, thunder rumbles up ahead, and suddenly, a huge ship descends from the dark clouds. It is, as it were, “Thor’s Chariot” – an Asgard mothership, Teal’c says. It zaps up all the Jaffa and sends Gairwyn back down. (It should be noticed that Heru’ur was away and escaped through the Stargate during all this.) She confirms that the Asgard have visited Earth often (thus the pop culture – how convenient) and are at war with the Goa’uld. However, Thor will not meet with them, as he feels the Tau’ri are still too young. He has replaced the Hammer, but it will “make an exception for the one called ‘Teal’c’”.

(Aww! That’s so great! I would make an exception for Teal’c, too. But who wouldn’t? Teal’c is amazing. And honorable. And he has such a way with words. And, frankly, pretty dang hot. I don’t have a Hammer above my dorm, Teal’c! You can come over! Really! I’m sure my roommates won’t mind!)

The mothership leaves, and the crew is left to ponder Thor and the Asgard people.

Final thoughts… Pretty neat episode, but it was a little slow until about halfway through. However, I can see a lot of recurring things coming up. Let’s go through them.

First, we’ve got another Goa’uld, Heru’ur. Maybe I’m just reading too much into the directing, but I swear there was something funny that passed between him and Teal’c. There must be some kind of history there I’m sure will play out in the future. Also, they have funny beak helmets, so maybe we’ll someday see funny snake helmets duke it out with funny bird helmets! Yeah!

Secondly, Carter did a little more exploring with her Goa’uld-like abilities. They’re faint, but there. I’m still wondering whether or not she retains these. They’ve shown up at least in passing nearly every episode since she played temporary host to Jolinar.

And finally, Thor and the Asgard. The writers seem to have taken the rather X-Files-ish route of explaining why there is all this intrigue in Earth pop culture about aliens looking a certain way. However, I suppose it only makes sense. The Goa’uld impersonated the Egyptian gods. It’s not so far-fetched to think that a race as advanced as the Asgard could actually be those Norse gods, and more. Like the Tok’ra, they’re a powerful force in the galaxy, and one I can see as being an ally to Earth and SGC.

All in all, I can see this as having been an overall very important episode in the larger story arc. Every episode, we’re meeting a new race that, in this plot, has a good chance of showing up again. It’s set up that way, and that’s part of what makes SG-1 so amazing.

REFLECTION/PREDICTION THINGY

(SG-1 talks about the Asgard.)

O’Neill: So, Daniel, you seriously think that the Asgards are the so-called “Roswell Grays”?

Jackson: The very same! Or – pretty darn close, anyways. Thor told us that his people had been to Earth many times before.

Carter: (Laughing) I wonder how that Fox Mulder guy – you know, the FBI nutjob who works in the X-Files division – would react to meeting an Asgard.

Teal’c: Likely the same as he would react to meeting me.

Jackson: I don’t know, Teal’c, you’re pretty human-looking. His partner… what’s her name? Sully?

Carter: Scully. Dana Scully.

Jackson: …Well, anyways, she’d probably explain you away as some kind of genetic anomaly.

O’Neill: Aside from Junior, and of course the… (He gestures vaguely to his forehead.) …I’d have to agree you’re a pretty convincing human.

Teal’c: I suppose that is a compliment?

O’Neill: It’s whatever you make of it, my alien friend.