All right. I know two things about this episode.
1. JACOB CARTER.
2. It’s a two-parter.
So, for the reason of the first item, let us not delay. ONWARD!
We’re at the base, and the Tok’ra have made a visit. (JACOB CARTER?!) Unfortunately, Jacob Carter is not there. We only get Martouf and two guys who I assume don’t matter very much at all.
Aw, crap, is this going to be another “Carter’s feelings” episode?
It gets worse. Jacob’s been captured and tortured by our good friend Sokar on his lovely little planet we could just call “Hell”, because that’s what Sokar’s turned it into.
Okay, so, the planet’s actually called “Netu”, and in many ways it’s sort of like Star Trek’s Rura Penthe… except, really hot instead of really cold. But it’s supposedly inescapable. Of course, our good friend Jolinar managed to escape, but she never told the other Tok’ra how she did it. So, now, they need Carter to try to access those memories so they can save her dad.
It gets worse again. Sokar is likely planning to launch an attack on the System Lords, and if they fall, then Sokar could pretty much send everyone to Hell… and it wouldn’t just be Netu now.
So, pretty much, they have to travel to an inescapable planet, save Jacob Carter, and take down Sokar, all in one fell swoop. Easy-peasy.
SG-1 enters into a pyramid ship (not as big as the one Apophis used, at least I don’t think so) that Jolinar had brought back with her from her initial escape. They plan to take it to Netu, with Teal’c at the helm (I love saying that. “Helm”. I miss saying that. I want more ships!! Waaahh!)… but, unfortunately, Teal’c can’t come with them, because he needs to be their getaway vehicle.
Well, that sucks. I’m sure he’d be very useful down there!
We do get a funny line:
Martouf: “Shall we embark?”
O’Neill: “By all means! To hell with us.”
Turns out that Sokar literally terraformed the surface of Netu in order to fit the Christian myths of Hell. However, in order to escape, they need to have Jolinar’s memories of how she escaped. On the ship, Martouf puts the memory device from “Out of Mind” (2x22) on her, and she does access the memories, but it turns out to just lead to more awkwardness between her and Martouf. Later, though, she does recall something: Jolinar’s torture. However, it drives her to screams and she yells for Martouf to shut it off.
Wow, that Sokar doesn’t hold anything back. If it was that painful in a memory…
DANGIT YOU GUYS HURRY UP OR ELSE SOMETHING BAD MIGHT HAPPEN TO JACOB!!!
They arrive at Netu, and Carter keeps the memory device on so that she can still access the memories, and they take a communication device so they can keep in touch with Teal’c. They enter the descent pods (which look oddly like coffins… I see what you did there, writers) and rocket down to the surface.
“To hell with us,” indeed.
They make it down all right, and it looks… well, pretty hellish. (Nicely done, artists and graphic designers and set production and lighting instructors.) I’d say it’s easily the most impressive set I’ve seen on this show thus far. In fact, it reminds me so strongly of Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, it’s almost uncanny. If I didn’t know better, I‘d say that one inspired the other… Except, uh, this place is WAY worse than Rura Penthe. The Klingons there aren’t exactly nice, but they’re not the devil, either.
Down there, Carter remembers that they must find someone named Bynarr, another Goa’uld (wait… a Goa’uld serving under another Goa’uld? Sokar must be more powerful than I thought), and they encounter his First Prime, Na’onak. Bynarr eventually shows up, and (first of all, he’s super ugly, missing an eyeball of all things) he orders them thrown into a pit and has their weapons taken away.
Carter has remembered that Jolinar slept with Bynarr in order to get him to help her (or so it seems) escape. Oh, yeah, that must be what she didn’t want Martouf to know.
And guess who’s there with them?
JACOB!!
Jacob! Hi! Hi hi hi hi!! Oh, dear, you look like you’re in bad shape! Let me get out my wand. “Reparo! Episkey! Ferula! Tergeo! Vulnera Sanentur!” Oh, wait, CRAP, I’M A MUGGLE! I CAN’T USE MAGIC! Oh, geez, sorry man, I guess SG-1 will just have to save you.
He’s been brutally tortured, just as Jolinar had been, and he won’t last if they don’t get him out of there.
Meanwhile, Teal’c watches the skies, and sees that there’s a transporter beam (or something that looks like it… similar to whatever Thor used in “Fair Game”). Interception and use that to save SG-1? He’s a smart guy. He’ll figure it out.
We also get a first look at SOKAR!! Well, his hood, anyways. He is super creepy. He also wants SG-1, Jacob, and Martouf dead. And the ship that brought them destroyed.
GET OUT OF THERE, TEAL’C!
Another interesting observation: Sokar’s Jaffa are each branded with a sort of pentagram. Now, someone more learned than me can correct me if I’m way off or wrong about this, but I know that the pentagram (a downward facing five-pointed star) is often associated with a sort of obsession with attainment of earthly power and that sort of thing. (At least, that’s what I learned at a very interesting panel on Wicca and the occult.) This is, of course, in contrast to the pentacle, which is moreso associated with a higher plane, as in reaching out to otherworldly beings/spririts/etc. instead of being so stuck in your “own little world”, as it were. Of course in modern pop culture the pentagram is simply associated with evil/the devil/that sort of thing, but even on a deeper level it says something about his character.
Other Jaffa are branded with the mark of their Goa’uld gods – a snake or bird, for example. There’s something seriously different and inherently more dangerous about Sokar. No wonder he’s gone so far as to literally call himself, “the Devil”.
Back on Netu, Jacob Carter tells them that Sokar’s army is “ten times bigger” than they thought, and that he’s ready to attack six system lords. (I hope one of them is Heru’ur, ’cause he’s a creep. Oh, wait…) They relay this to Teal’c, or at least they were going to, but then Na’onak interrupts and takes Carter with him to go see Bynarr.
Let’s hope this goes well…
Carter enters into Mister Ugly Bynarr’s chamber, and it turns out that it gets worse: Jolinar had actually betrayed Bynarr. Ooh, she was a bad woman! (In a sexual way, of course.) Bynarr didn’t help her escape at all, though he was indeed in love with her. (Okay, now that’s just creepy.) Suddenly, Na’onak shows up just as Bynarr is about to use his ribbon device on Carter…
…AND SHOOTS HIM!?
Okay, this just got SUPER CRAZY. And now there are riots. And uprisings. They can use the transport rings here to get to Teal’c’s ship…
…But that’s not going to work, because Teal’c is being attacked by a couple of Gliders! Get out of there man! He’s forced to try and “run”, as it were, away, but they force him out of communication range.
And just as they’re about to escape, the prison guards show up… with Na’onak. He’s using a hand device? But he’s a Jaffa? Can they do that? Is he a Jaffa?
But Na’onak’s not his real name. He removes his helmet, and he’s..
APOPHIS?!?!
WHAT WHAT WHAT?!
BUT HE’S DEAD!
BUT-?!
ISN’T HE?
HOOOOLY CRAAAAAAAAP.
Final thoughts… APOPHIS. Y U NO STAY DEAD?
All right, internet memes and my COMPLETE AND UTTER SHOCK aside, this episode was just… Wow. Of course it would’ve been better if we’d actually gotten to see Teal’c more than just behind the helm of a pyramid ship, but no episode can be perfect… However, we did get Jacob Carter. That helps.
So much happened! Jacob Carter! Jolinar’s secrets! Apophis is back! Bynarr is dead! Sokar is revealed! We’ve all gone to Hell! I have literally no idea how this could end. There have been so many awesome twists and turns and possible ways this could go! What if Sokar’s plan succeeds? What if they escape but Sokar still plans to launch his evil attack? What the heck is going on with Apophis?
Another thing: SG-1 is the team that literally handed Apophis over to Sokar. I know he’s the devil and all, but why is he so eager to see them killed? Couldn’t he strike a deal with them or something? And Apophis, what’s he going to do? I hope he remembers how they actually granted him asylum and tried their darndest to save his (host’s) life. Someone’s got to give here. If they don’t, then they’re just being jerkfaces. But not slimeballs. I leave that term for people like Maybourne and the Cigarette Smoking Man (from The X-Files).
Must… watch… next… episode… NOW!!
REFLECTION/PREDICTION THINGY
(SG-1 will try to reason with Apophis.)
O’Neill: Heeey! Long time no see, buddy!
Jackson: Um, sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but… your wife’s dead. No, my wife. Sorry. Nevermind. Both our wives? NEVERMIND.
Carter: You know, you’re a jerkface.
O’Neill: Carter! I’m trying to get on his good side!
Martouf: I wish Jolinar were here…
Jacob Carter: Could I get a doctor? Please?
Selmak: Quit your whining!
Apophis: /trollface
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