"Small Victories" ( 4 x 01 )

Okay, first of all, the DVD menu looks really cool now. Way cooler than the past DVD sets.

Secondly, based on the title, I’d say this episode is going to have a pretty happy conclusion to the MESS we got into at the end of last season. Replicators, SG-1, and Thor, here we go!

The scene opens up… Hey, we’re on Earth! But, uh, we’re not in Colorado. We’re… underwater?

We’re in a submarine, probably Russian, given that that’s what the guys onboard are speaking. (Why is this feeling more like X-Files than Stargate?) They hear rattling from inside a tank (DON’T OPEN IT) and they open it. (What did I just tell them NOT to do? This is sci-fi. You never open anything unarmed.)

And what’s in there?

A Replicator.

WELL, THIS IS JUST FANTASTMITASTIC!

The lame opening is back. Hmph. That’s too bad. Looks like they’ll be making a habit out of this.

We’re on Base, and Jackson is healing up nicely from his appendicitis, but Fraiser tells him to take it easy. They’ve got the Area 51 ‘Gate all set up, and suddenly, the alarms blare!

SG-1?!

Jackson rushes out of the infirmary and to the launch room… and SG-1 steps out!

“We’re all all right!”

They all look about the same, except Teal’c has this really strange beard… thing.

Uh…

…I have no idea what to say. It’s bizarre.

Anyways, everyone seems pretty much back to their old selves. The danger is passed, it seems that Thor is a-okay (he was retrieved on the planet, presumably by his own people), and O’Neill can’t help but joke: “I’ll be happy to debrief you once I’ve debriefed myself for a long, hot shower.”

O’Neill still plans on going fishing (I don’t think you’re ever going to get that trip, Jack) and sure enough, Carter gets a phone call and… well, their work isn’t done yet. Earth’s not safe yet.

At the Hangout, they get news of an attack on a Russian submarine – mechanical spiders. Fun stuff. Sounds like our Replicators. Major Davis says that the Big Wigs want to study a couple of these Replicators, but of course O’Neill just wants to blow them all up. What’s worse, the Russians are getting suspicious of this cover-up.

The Stargate whirls to life, and suddenly the base starts to shut down – all but the ‘Gate. (OH CRAP.)

Oh hey, it’s Thor! Okay, everything’s fine. Never mind.

OH HE’S OKAY!! YAY!

He’s come because… well, it’s not exactly for good news. Turns out that his own homeworld has been threatened by the Replicators, and he wants SG-1’s help. (Uh, dude, we have our own Replicators to worry about..?) Pretty much, they need a different perspective – a less sophisticated one – to take down the Replicators. Carter agrees to go with him, and they exit through the ‘Gate.

They transport directly onto an outlook on the Asgard homeworld (IT LOOKS SO COOL) and gaze up at a ship called the O’Neill. (Is he really that great?) It’s the last hope they have to defeat the Replicators. Let’s hope it works.

Meanwhile, O’Neill and Teal’c go to check out the Russian sub, while Jackson sits behind the controls elsewhere to keep an eye on them and the others with them – Baker and Stevens. (O’Neil and Baker are on one team, and Teal’c and Stevens, another.)

They wander through the darkened sub, and there are already several Replicators. They’re a different colour, apparently, but I’m thinking that’s just because they’re feeding off of – and thus replicating from – a different material. Just like the Borg emulate whatever race they originally were, the Replicators probably look like whatever metal they consume.

Teal’c and Stevens find a WHOLE BUNCH of Replicators in another room, and there’s what looks like a big, huge, fat one in the center. (Oh, ew.) Stevens makes the mistake of freaking out and shooting one, and… well, he’s screwed. Teal’c manages to make it out, but Stephens goes down almost immediately.

On Thor’s ship, Carter tries to figure out the nuts and bolts of the Replicators (no pun intended), but it’s proving to be a bit (a LOT) complicated. However, she does have a virtual sort of specimen to pick apart as best she can.

Thor’s kind enough to ask if she’s hungry (well, actually, no, he just asks if she “requires sustenance”, you know those aliens and their language…) and offers her these weird food-block things. Apparently they’re not so great.

But they’ve got bigger problems than nasty food. The five Asgard ships (FIVE) that had been sent after the Replicator-infested ships have just been defeated… and the Repli-ships are on their way to the Asgard homeworld. Oh snap.

In a makeshift infirmary, Fraiser patches up Teal’c, who was briefly attacked but he got away. He’ll be okay, but the good news is that they’ve now got a little Replicator piece to study. Jackson, meanwhile, figures out that they are, indeed, made of what the submarine is made of. And yet, there’s still the original bug which could survive any attack they launch on it.

We’re once more on the Belisknor, and we learn that if an Asgard ship enters Hyper Speed (I assume that’s like Star Trek’s warp speed/drive) it loses control of its weapons and shields. Unfortunately, the Replicators aren’t in a hurry.

Carter thinks that if they send the O’Neill out there (a most enticing prize for the Replicators) and get the bugs to chase after it, they could rig it to self-destruct while in Hyper Speed and thus destroy the Repli-ships, too. Thor’s not so keen on this idea (it’s kind of like sacrificing the Enterprise), but Carter fairly states that if the Replicators get to the Asgard world, there won’t be any point in finishing up the O’Neill. In any case, it’s a huge gamble… and one Thor’s not willing to take.

Carter gets frustrated because Thor had come to them for help. He eventually agrees they should try it.

On the submarine, Teal’c and O’Neill are back on – this time without backup. (Is that really smart?) They create an energy diversion to attract all the Replicators away from the “queen bug”, of sorts. They do destroy the Queen, but the replicators are coming…! And they’ve blocked the escape hatch!

O’Neill yells for Jackson to give the order to blow the ship, but of course he’s reluctant. (WELL, DUH.)

The O’Neill is launched, and the Repli-ships go after it. (Yay…!) And then they get destroyed! (YAY!!)

Carter gives Thor an awkward embrace (HAAAAAHAHA) and she even earns herself a compliment:

“It was your stupid idea, Major Carter.”

Just stupid enough to save your planet, bud!

Back on the sub, Teal’c and O’Neill are still stuck onboard with no way out, and Daniel eventually gives the order. The torpedoes hit…!

…TEAL’C?! JACK?!

AND THEY’RE TAKEN AWAY!?

Yay!!

I know transporter technology when I see it!

They materialize on the bridge of the Belisknor, and they’re okay! Turns out that Thor managed to speed the ship back to Earth just in time to locate the two and beam them up. (Nice timing!) It’s a small victory, but a victory nonetheless.

But the Replicators are far from wiped out…

Final thoughts… Teal’c’s beard is weird. IT’S SO WEIRD. Why does he have it!?

…I’m sure we’ll find out eventually.

But that’s not exactly the most important aspect of this episode. I digress – it was a pretty great conclusion. It wasn’t as exciting as the season finale but it was still pretty great how Carter managed to figure out how to defeat all three of the Replicator-infested ships at once. Looks like Thor got a little lesson in humility and alternative thinking, as well! Just goes to show you that even smart guys like them can’t think of everything.

The whole submarine thing was kind of crazy, but despite the fact that the sub is now destroyed and the Replicators dead too (we presume), it brings up another problem: the Russians.

Now, despite how cliché that is to get the Russians involved, it’s another sub-plot point nonetheless. I mean, it was only a matter of time before another nation got suspicious of what they were doing over here in the ‘States. I really hope that they go somewhere with this storyline, because at times, it’s been just as important to see what happens on Earth as it is to tell the stories of other worlds.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find some new materials to feed Data. He’s become quite fond of– QUIT EATING MY PRINTER, DATA! BAD REPLICATOR! BAD!! And quit eating the lightbulb holder on Apophis’ fish tank!

PREDICTION/REFLECTION THINGY:

(SG-1 celebrates yet another victory.)

O’Neill: Have you guys noticed that right around this time every year, we end up saving the world, or at least embarking in some crazy mission?

Jackson: Well, last year wasn’t that crazy…

Carter: The colonel did almost become host to a Goa’uld.

O’Neill: What else is new?

Jackson: Teal’c’s… uh… (He gestures vaguely to the beard.)

Teal’c: (Frowning) Do not speak of it further.