CLONES?!
Oh, wait, that was Pokémon. Not to mention about thirteen years ago.
…Now I feel old.
We start off on a planet, and out steps… SG-1!
Suddenly, SG-1 is surrounded, and Jack gets zat’d. A young man steps out and recognizes them, but SG-1 doesn’t seem to have any recollection of this planet.
I just realized that the back of Daniel’s hair looks kind of long. And Carter’s hair looks kind of funny, too. Hm…
Turns out that this planet was once Heru’ur’s, and in the past, SG-1 had booted his cronies off. Now, Cronus and his cronies are here (ha, Cronus’ cronies…) and kind of took the planet by storm.
Jackson, Carter, and Teal’c are taken to Cronus’ pyramid ship, since O’Neill apparently managed to escape.
That evening, the young man who’d discovered them, Darian, returns to his home and… finds O’Neill there. O’Neill with brown hair. He basically tells Darian that, no, Cronus isn’t a god either, and that they’ll find a way to stop him.
THIS DOESN’T MAKE SENSE I WANT ANSWERS GAAAH.
The next day, Cronus arrives to meet with his cronies (I’m just going to have so much fun with that alliteration), and of course he’s just thrilled to hear about Teal’c being there. Since they’re off-world, SG-1 isn’t protected by that wonderful Asgard treaty.
O’Neill has gone incognito and poses as one of the human warriors while the rest of SG-1 is lined up on their knees. Teal’c looks about ready to tear off Cronus’ head, no doubt for what he did to his father.
(You get ‘im, Teal’c. Go kick his butt. But not too hard. He’s not that bad a guy. Not really. Not like Apophis. Okay, maybe, but he has cool hair! And let’s face it: He’s not quite a jerkface.)
Daniel is brought forward first, and Darian is ordered to kill him. He points the staff weapon at him, and a look passes between Daniel and Jack. Daniel shakes his head “no”… And the staff weapon is fired…
AND DANIEL’S HEAD POPS OFF?!
OH MY GOD IT’S THE ANDROIDS
HAAAHAHA this just got about ten thousand times more interesting!
Oh my god. This is crazy. Who would know that we would see those guys from “Tin Man” again? I guess it makes sense. That’s why they all still look like they’re from the first season! Unfortunately Daniel is already dead (kind of ironic; in the film he was ordered by Ra to fire on O’Neil and his people with a staff weapon, except that he instead turned back around and tried to assassinate Ra) but I suppose it’s become a bit of a running joke. “How many times can we kill off Daniel Jackson?”)
We’re back on base, and SG-1 rushes down when the ‘Gate activates. (I should note that Daniel’s not with them, however, according to the opening credits, Michael Shanks was directing this episode.)
Guess what? It’s our good friend Harlan, from P3X-989. You know, kind of annoying, chubby, short little guy with a big personality?
Well, anyways, they let him through, and he apprises them of the situation.
“You must help… you.”
Apparently, the android counterparts of SG-1 go on missions to fight the Goa’uld, just like ours do. However, they can’t stay out more than forty-eight hours, or their power packs run out.
And they’ve got about eight hours of charge left.
Our Carter confirms that they did go to Juna (the planet where the androids are at) once before, and now they plan to come back. They dial out and send a MALP through and… yup, there are Jaffa there. Cronus’ cronies, as well as Jack’s counterpart. He’s taken them down, and now has an ally in Darian.
Our SG-1 emerges from the ‘Gate, and it’s kind of funny when Android O’Neill and O’Neill get snarky with each other, comparing who’s “real” and who’s “better”, among other things. Personally I think they're both pretty funny. They get into a fight, but luckily Carter intervenes:
“Sirs! As much as I’d like to see how this plays out, don’t we have something more important to do?”
They move out, determined to prove to the people once and for all that Cronus is just a guy with cronies.
On Cronus’ ship, a female Goa’uld, Ja’din is interrogating the android counterparts of Teal’c and Carter, trying to figure out how they work. Neither speaks at first, but finally Teal’c protests in her torturing of Carter.
In Darian’s home, Android O’Neill tells them that all the androids were built with internal radios. It seems to be some kind of mechanical telepathy… or something. He communicates with Android Teal’c and Carter and they’re going to try and get to the transport rings so our SG-1 can come and help.
Just underneath the ship, Android O’Neill is brought before Cronus’ First Prime… and I hope he knows what he’s doing.
Then Darian hits the First Prime with a crossbow, and Android O’Neill shoots a bunch of people, and our SG-1 comes in, and AWESOMENESS! Unfortunately Android O’Neill isn’t in good shape at all.
Once more on Cronus’ vessel, Android Carter is asked how to operate the power unit left on their Daniel’s body, and she says to simply touch the two crystals together.
…Why do I get a bad feeling about this?
Android Teal’c has requested an audience with Cronus, presumably to bargain for the other Carter’s life, and he says,
“My only wish… is to seek revenge for the death of my father.”
FFFFFF YEAH TEAL’C! YOU GO!
He takes out the two guards and even when he can’t get through Cronus’ shield, runs up and grabs him around the neck! Aaah, Jaffa revenge is so sweet!
Gets even better when, back with Ja’din, that power cell she activated?
Self-destruct device.
BOOM!
However, the alarm which goes off alerts the rest of Cronus’ cronies, and they rush in to fire on Android Teal’c and break him apart from a gagging Cronus. Android Carter transports our SG-1 up to the ship, and Carter and O’Neill work to seal off the level…
…And Teal’c goes to assist his counterpart.
‘Cause he’s got a dad to avenge.
Teal’c is injured by a staff blast, and then OH CRAP CRONUS GET YOUR HAND OUT OF HIS POUCH RIGHT NOW BEFORE I SEEK REVENGE ON YOU.
Android Carter works to pull out the crystals to close off the doors, but it’s clearly quite painful… and she collapses soon after. Another casualty.
And then back on the bridge, something awesome happens:
Android Teal’c shoots Cronus down and saves our Teal’c.
“For our father.”
And then falls over dead.
(Aww… But I suppose just one Teal’c is enough for this universe.)
Android O’Neill speaks with Darian, and he’s on his deathbed, too. Jack comes over and has a last word with his counterpart, coming with the sad news that the android-SG-1 members are dead.
“Are we still so far from real to you?”
“No. I guess not.”
“Then I believe… We are done.”
And he dies.
Well, god, this is depressing.
But guess what?
We have a Ha’tak mothership now!
Final thoughts… If there were ever to be an award for ten of the most intense minutes in sci-fi… I’d say that the last part of this was just crazy. I literally have no idea how to react to this episode. It had this just kind of weird storyline but, gosh darnit, they made it work.
How the heck do they do it?
In many ways, this worked out as an alternate universe sort of episode. Just because the androids were androids didn’t make them any less “real”, as it were, than our SG-1. In many ways they were the same people. One of the defining moments of this notion of sameness was first between the two Teal’c’s… I loved that last line from the android counterpart: “For our father.” It was nothing less than a huge moment for Teal’c, inadvertently getting his revenge on the man who murdered his father. However, since they were essentially one in the same, it still felt “real”.
It’s kind of funny. Although we only knew these characters for one episode prior – “Tin Man” – there was still an emotional pull to see each of them go down. And none of them died in vain. O’Neill died having held off the Jaffa and taken down Cronus’ First Prime so that our SG-1 could get up there. Carter sacrificed herself at the crystals to save her human counterpart and Jack. Daniel… well, Daniel was unfortunately executed, but he’d apparently lived the past few years with the android SG-1. Teal’c was able to avenge “his” father by ultimately being Cronus’ downfall.
But frankly, I’m most excited to see what SG-1 gets to do with this fancy new ship.
The season finale is next!
REFLECTION/PREDICTION THINGY
(Ships are so much fun!)
O’Neill: Is this the best or what?! We’ve got a hatik-
Teal’c: -Ha’tak-
O’Neill: -ship and one less Goa’uld and today just couldn’t be any better.
Carter: Well, we could have our counterparts.
Teal’c: They did not die in vain, Major Carter.
O’Neill: You know, he’s right. And now we can go kick some more Goa’uld behind and do it quicker now.
Carter: And you never fail to astound me, sir…
I love all the different variations on "alternate universes" in Stargate ... this was a clever way to do that.
ReplyDeleteIt almost seems like the writers have a brainstorming meeting together and say, "What's a hook that's going to make people say, 'Woah, what on earth is going on here?'" -- and then they say, "Now, how are we going to explain that?"
I wonder if that's the order they do it in -- first the set up, then the explanation. Or do they do it in reverse? Or some other approach? Anyway, they're great writers.
This episode was written by Robert C. Cooper, who wrote lots of my favourites: The Fifth Race, Fair Game, Point of View, Nemesis, Absolute Power ... about 50 of the 213 Stargate SG-1 episodes.